In the NHL and the hockey industry, they look at games and they think that it’s so awesome. That we play a sport we love, we’re getting paid a ton, and everything is so easy. But, there’s huge pressure. First of all, the pressure to perform every day, because every day, there’s a player that wants to take your spot. You’re not guaranteed. If you’re a fighter, there’s a pressure to win and fear of getting hurt. This all goes through your mind and creates anxiety.
Sometimes the guys deal with this anxiety with alcohol or drugs, which has led to problems even now. So many men, we’re hard-headed. We don’t want to show any sign of weakness. We don’t want to show any emotion. We don’t want to share. We don’t want to ask for help. We take all that pressure on by ourselves, and it contributes to the state of our mental health.
Many years ago, it was taboo. But it’s no longer taboo. More and more, men are opening up about it, successful men, athletes. They’re showing everyone it’s okay to ask for help – that it will help you to be more successful at whatever you’re doing.
I did a lot of meditation to help me through my anxieties and took on different therapists, to help me clear my head from everything that the job had put into my mind. During my career, it was really hard for me to get into serious relationships, because of my anxiety. That pressure of the game and the fight, it was hard because I couldn’t focus, and the anxiety was occupying my mind all the time. As I got older and nearer to the end of my career, I started doing more yoga and meditation. It made it easier to get into a relationship, because it calmed down those anxieties. I took the help I needed to clean up my mind with all the anxiety, and it made it easier to live and to share my life with someone.
My hope for the future is that no taboo remains for men seeking help. I want there to be just as many men as women in therapy. That it’s accepted that it’s strong to ask for help. My message to men is to not feel like you need to be invincible. It’s okay to ask for help. It won’t just make you feel better, but everyone around you too. Seeking help shows the next generation, your kids, that it’s okay. It’s normal. And it’s good for everyone.