"Getting a job in an industry you love can seem like a dream that you just can’t let go of. When I had my first taste of working with video games, I knew I’d found my passion. It hooked me like nothing else, and all I wanted to do was make amazing games. I became transfixed with my career, always trying to be the best and doing everything in my power to make everyone happy. It felt like I would stop at nothing.
But as time passed, that became exponentially harder, and I soon found myself watching the job of my dreams turn into my worst enemy. Near constant crunch and a suffocating lack of control left me burnt out, ready to leave everything I had worked for behind.
I wasn’t myself anymore, spending each night before work dreading going back into the office, facing another day of anxiety and still telling everyone I was doing great. But I couldn’t lie to myself forever, and eventually I realised I couldn’t stand to face it for another day. It was there I made the tough choice to leave that part of my career behind, as much as it pained me.
But I refused to let that experience stop me from working on games again. In time, I weathered the effects of working myself to breaking point, got together with the other founders and started Hutch. Our purpose being to create a space that didn’t allow the same thing to happen to others.
I’ve spent a long time reflecting on that experience and what it meant for me, how my determination to deliver nearly ruined my mental health. It's far too easy to get lost in our careers and the frantic pace of daily life, neglecting the things that matter until they get buried in the noise. We so often find ourselves with a forced smile and words of reassurance, but deep down we know that hiding from truth is hurting us.
We all owe it to ourselves to break the cycle, to kick our fears of being vulnerable, and now more than ever, provide support for everyone around us who needs it. Being ambitious is great, but it can be tough, too. At times, we spend so long trying to be the person we want to be, that we forget to look after the person we are."